A cute little box inside my heart

I still feel the smiles, the glee

All the silliness and all the laughter

And I keep getting sad
As if it all didn't matter...

So I'm fitting it into a cute little box inside of my heart.

Your smile, your laughter
Our silliness and glee.
Finally hopping you'll never forget about me.

Cisne.

Sometimes I don't know how you are feeling. Those times, I know exactly how I feel like and it ain't no good.

 Cisne.

A thousand miles away from you

You just didn't had to be like that, you know? I think you're proud of me - I hope you are; but it would be nice to be sure.

I don't know why you sometimes say so many awful things to us, to people actually, but specially to us - D. and me. And you never seem to know when to stop, it's like...you're hearing crying but you're not really listening.

Most times, I don't understand you or wth you are saying but I keep trying to. Can't you just try? I wish you could but i don't thing you'll ever change.

I love you but sometimes you make me ask why do I. And that's terrible - I don't know why it happens. It's as hurtful as interesting: dispite I am your daughter you don't know me that well but you always know so, so well where my scars are. You find them, you dig them, and then you walk away, leaving me confusingly sad, not knowing what to do next, because my head starts hurting as much as my tears fall down my face.

I'm alright now. I may cry and get a little lost when we have a fight and you say things that are extremly unfair, but I'm not five anymore so I won't (don't worrie) sit on the floor crying for attention, 'til I get what I want from you: comprehension, pride.

No. I will think about our fight a little (okay, a lot more than a little), I will sleep on it (maybe dream on it) and tomorrow I will scatch a yellow smile and a wispered «good morning». And I will do that, not because I forgot what you unfairly had said to me or because I've concluded you were right. I will do it because I understand that with you, it's always going to be like this: First you hurt me, then I try to fight back, I fail, you turn around, I cry, I sleep on it all, I wake up, and I smile again.

And it's okay.


Cisne.

#1 Letter to my best friend

Dear Best friend,

I don't know you and I don't know if I will ever do. Without knowing exactly why, I spent huge part of my life avoiding you and now the only person I look for is you.

But it ain't fair, you know? I didn't know it was like this... They never teach us or tell us this things; how was I suposed to know I had got to make friends in my school years or I would be with no friends for a life? Now I feel so lonely... I miss you without even knowing if I had once known you and have not recognised you. Can it be? That I had lost you without really knowing what was that I was loosing? It might be...

I don't know if I will find you someday or if it's too late for me... Maybe it is. I don't like to think about it a lot, I'd rather forget and fullfil the emptyness in me with other type of love and understanding... I hope you're not far or untouchable - you are need too much.

Please promiss me you'll come or that you'll let me find you. Promiss I won't feel alone anymore... Deal?


I really miss you,
Swan.

I got lost in time

I got lost in time.
In my sleep dreams fade away.
When I wake up I hide,
I can't stand reality one more day.


My body lies on my bed
My confort is soft, my thoughs are led
To an endless dispair
To a desperation which was once so rare.


I convinced my self to live.
It's no good to fall asleep.
When sleeping what is there to achieve?,
Walk along, little girl, you have life to receive.


Vamos lá Cisne, cabeça erguida... Os dias não podem ser todos bons.

Cisne.

Ajudem, ajudem!!

Malta, eis o meu dilema: Preciso de escrever um artigo em inglês acerca de um assunto relacionado com «The World Around Us». Parece ser só qualquer coisa aborrecida acerca do ambiente, etc, etc, mas até nem é; é um pouco mais expansivo: pode ser acerca de tragédias como a queda de um avião ou a nuvem de cinzas... Todavia, não consigo achar um tema de que não seja secante falar ou que sequer me apeteça... Tenho até Domingo para o escrever- 23 de Maio.

Ideias??!


Cisne.

I miss you

This is just a little something I wrote and that I wanted to share with you. It's not that great, I can do better, but you know... It helps my brain not to stop an it keeps me inspired to do best (i hope lol). Hope you enjoy it! =D

How can I make you believe I miss your eyes?

And that my heart,

Apart from yours, it cries?

I miss your laugh,

Because it always makes me smile,

Even if it's just for a while.

How come you make me desire your soul,

If I can't get even close of reading it,

Not at all.

My love,

I even dare to miss the way you change me,

Because you do;

My true love,

I miss you.

Last month, something unusual happened and I thought that it could be interesting to make a little reflection about that.


I was arriving to school and when just about passing the school gates I found a cell phone on the floor. I picked it up and saw a picture of a little girl. Obviously it belonged to her. I was already late to my maths' class so I hurry in phoning to her (whoever she turned out to be... lol) mother.


When the lady the other side awnser me it was kind of funny because she started asking some awkward questions like «How does it looks the phone?» and «who is on the phone screen». Well, why should I identify the phone and its owner? I'm calling to her mother, where the hell would I get this number? Lol


Well, a few minutes later (and I was back then reaaaaaaaaly late for school) the lady shows up. She was very nice and started saying that her daughter should have let it drop because she usually is very distracted. I sad it was okay and said I was in a hurry so I have to go.


Later in class I start thinking... I didn't thought twice about returning the phone (ok, that phone was too much technology for me to handle but still, I could have kept it and sell it to somebody or so), but would everybody have done the same thing I've done?


What do you think? Is there any honesty and kindness in our world? Please let me know about your opinion.

Unfinished

Tell me something I don't know.

Tell me about the world beneath my feet,

The one I tresure, respect and always greet.

Warn me about entrapments.

Warn the world to warn me,

'Cause you're the only one I can never see.

Bridge:

Today I've gone wild.

Today I've became one of a kind,

But you don't even seem to mind.

Chours:

Love me, or leave me.

Warship what you see.

Write the unwritten pages,

Of this diary.

(Súbita inspiração; incontrolável...) 11.10.08

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